Die to Myself?!?!?
What does it mean to die to oneself? Im not gonna lie. When I used to hear that question, I would feel like there was a lump in my throat like “What you mean DIE?!?!?……………………….to myself?!?!? It wasn’t until recently that I really decided to look deeper into that. Over the years death has been something that frightened me. I remember when I had my first loved one die and I was old enough to actually understand it. It was my grandma, and I was a few years out of college and in those few short years she had truly become a best friend of mine. I loved her sooo much. I grew up being so scared of her but somewhere along the line she just became a best friend. She shared many stories of her glory days, taught me important life lessons, and even prepared me for her passing. Ill never forget the time she asked me to take her shoe shopping. She took forever in every store we went to, mainly because she liked to walk up and down the aisles. Usually, she had me take her to the grocery store but this particular day she needed me to take her to the shoe store. She didn’t tell me why she needed to go to the shoe store until she got in the car. She plopped half of her body in my car, grabbed the handle above her head and hoisted the rest of her body in. She looked at me and smiled. “Where to Grams?” “Let’s go to DSW” she said. “Okay!” “Today I need to find some coral shoes for my funeral.” I laughed a bit and hit her with the “What G-Ma, your gonna live forever!!!!” She looked at me with the most shocked and appalled look on her face and said “Tuhh, I better not.” During our ride she explained that death wasn’t a bad thing. She explained that her husband, family and almost all of her friends were gone, and though she loved spending time with her family she felt out of place. The longer she stayed, the more she would be a burden. She told me she wasn’t afraid because she knew where she was going. And though it wasn’t up to her she knew that soon God would transition her. I’ll never forget that conversation because it taught me not to fear death. Then after months of grieving and years of watching my mother grieve it taught me death truly only matters to the people still living.
So when I hear someone say “die to self” I try to think of it the same way my Gma thought of her actual death. A necessary step that takes place in order for me to stay in alignment with Gods will and His way. Nowhere in the bible does it directly say the words “die to yourself”, but in 1 Corinthians 15:31 it says “I assure you, believers, by the pride which I have in you in [your union with]] Christ Jesus our Lord, I die daily [I face death and die to self].” The Bible also says in Galatians 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” These 2 scriptures mean that everyday we must make the choice to forego our lustful desires and egotistical nature and choose to seek the kingdom of God and follow Christ. Sounds easy enough right? Well, don’t get your hopes up. I wouldn’t be a good friend if I didn’t tell you its much easier said than done. Especially when we are LIVING living. Many times we live a good life according to the world but we shy away from living a holy life pleasing and acceptable to the Lord. Often because we allow many of our “small sins” to control our actions. However, just like my Gma we need to come to the realization that living according to the world won’t sustain us and it certainly can’t fulfill us. Matthew 6:26 reminds us by asking us this important question, “… what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?” I don’t know about you but nothing and no one is worth me losing my soul nor is it worth me losing the ability to spend eternity with my Father in Heaven. Instead we must follow Jesus’ instructs and “…let him deny himself and take up his cross, and follow me.” This means putting Gods desires that he has for you above everything else. It also means outwardly displaying your inward change that shows you follow Christ. That means you no longer show up as the world pleaser but instead you show up as the holy spirit convicted, God pleaser. Again, its not easy but TUHHH you better not stay the same.
Faithphilly Yours,
Amanda Christine
